Coping with a Late Bloomer

Mrs Hajara Usman

When we were taught in Education that learners are categorised into SLOW, AVERAGE and BRILLIANT and that a classroom is usually filled with learners with individual differences, l never thought it would hold sway for children that come from the same family. I believed it could only be so for those children that came from diverse parents because of differences in genetic intelligence quotient (IQ).
Little did l know that my impression was a fallacious premise.

I remember when l discovered that my auta, the last of my sons was a very slow learner. His first three brothers were so academically bright that we never needed any intervention classes for any of them to pass exceedingly well.
It was when Auta was in Primary three that l actually noticed that his reading skills were very poor. I knew it would be a very big problem if it was not corrected early enough and so priding myself a good teacher, l decided to get "The Queen Primer" to teach him how to read, starting from two letter words. I decided to devote at least two hours of my busy schedule three times a week to develop his reading skills. I believe that must have been the most frustrating period of my life because l just couldn't get him to get the rudiments of those very simple sentences.
A session will go something like this:
ME--I go up
Am l to go up?
Yes, l am.
Auta-- l goes down
Is he to goes up?
No, l was.
🤔🤔🤔🤔🤔🤔🤔🤔

Repeatedly, l will try to correct him but it seemed as if he already had his own fixed lines in his head which he felt was the right thing.
I said to myself "Hajara, how is it possible that you gave birth to this blockhead? The thing be say, if to say the boy don at any time visit Okene before that time, l for dey suspect say na Ebira people mess up im head, but this was not the case.
At a point, any time we were to start our session, l will keep a cane by me to whoop him for failing to recite the lines properly, that's aside the series of hot cracking knocks on his coconut head but l noticed this only aggravated his memory block and anytime we were to begin, Auta will be sweating like a lamb about to be led to slaughter.
What did l now do? I decided to change tactics. I discontinued the sessions and only resolved to help him with his homework, after having a word with his teacher in school about his peculiar problem. I started building his self-esteem and before you know, he gradually started picking up. Person wey dey post 27/28 position gradually moved from 22-19-18-16th where he finally stabilized. I stopped worrying because l felt he must be allowed to grow at his own pace if he is not to develop hatred and phobia for academics.

This was how we managed him until he finished primary and secondary school and surprisingly, he was able to pass the SSCE and UTME all on his own, though not with top grades.
After his very first year in the University, Auta by the grace of God, flunked about five out of eight courses. His Professor-uncle in the same University (Hubby's brother) called his father and was explaining the tragedy to him. With the way the conversation was going, l knew l had to do something to mollify the Prof so l requested to be given the phone and l said, "Prof, you see ba, don't use the standard of Khalifa's older brother(also a graduate from the same University) to judge him o. This one is damaged goods which we are just trying to encourage. We are not looking for First, Second Class upper or lower from him. Just for him to graduate, so take it easy with him." Prof no know when im begin laugh o. Atoh. Person no go kill himself na. If out of 100%, person score 75%, pesin go say God no try?

Today, my Auta is stabilising. At least, he was able to clear his carry-overs in his second year and gradually getting the hang of his course. We need to be patient with our children because they are endowed differently, cognitive wise. Some can catch fast, others need a little bit more time to get it and if you are so much in a hurry to achieve results, you may end up doing more harm than good.

Happy Sunday to all my friends.

Hajara Usman is a Writer, Teacher, Wife and a Mother